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My hubby and his friend fought – wants me to stop talking to his friend


“Can he hate me and love you my wife”? “when both of you eventually make up, what happens to me”? I asked. “Will i not look foolish”?

How are you Guess Iyke. I am already excited writing you. My story get as e be o! It’s my hubby o Guess Iyke! He had a serious fight with his closest friend so they are not talking and because he is not talking with his friend, he wants me to also stop talking to the guy, can you imagine?

INTRODUCTION

My husband and i have been married for three years and we have a son. We actually began dating from university days so we dated for seven years before we got married. So it was only natural that we had mutual friends especially as we were in the same class in school.

THE FIGHT

My husband has this friend from school days and seven years after school they are very close. I actually met him through my husband even though he was also in our class in school. My husband loves chess so his friend comes around every other weekend and they play chess together and they also watch football matches together. My hubby is a Man U fan and our friend an Arsenal fan…lol.

It was easy to come to our home by weekends as we stay on the same street besides he is not married so his weekend meal is often on us…lol. Iyke my brother, last two week o, my hubby and his friend had a serious fight in our home, as-in serious fight!! I won’t tell you what caused the fight oooo….lol…sorry. But it was so bad. As i write you they are not on speaking terms, it’s that bad.

I BEAR THE BRUNT

Because we live on the same street, running into my hubby’s friend is inevitable. I have tried to talk my hubby into making peace but he has just been defiant. Their fight happend on a Sunday and the Tuesday evening that followed it, my hubby and i went to a store down our street to get stuffs, behold we ran into his friend(or enemy, which one i wan call am sef..lol). I saw his friend first and i tapped my hubby..“see your friend”. When he looked and saw that it was that guy, Iyke if you see the way he shoved me!(and his friend saw it) Haba! They both passed each other and none said hi. Nna, me i pass too o without saying hi.

When we got home my hubby started..”what was that”? “God saved you that you did not talk to him”.”So i should not talk to your friend because both of you are fighting”? “Is it not childish”? I asked? Iyke my bobo flared up o! “Are you stupid”? “Are you taking sides with him or taking sides with me”? “Can he hate me and love you my wife”? “So he can be your friend and be my enemy”? My bobo was barking. Nna Iyke as i see him red eye, i calm down o…That was on a Tuesday.

The Saturday that followed, usually once it’s one pm his friend comes to our house. So by twelve or so i had prepared my hubby’s favorite meal and my bobo ate wella. While we were seated in the living room watching TV there was a knock on the door and my hubby jumped up like someone going to war but it turned out to be our neighbor who wanted us to move our car so he could drive out.

MY QUESTION

When my hubby came back from re-parking the car, i asked him: “Babe, it’s obvious you thought that was your friend knocking”? “Ehnhen, and what about it”? He answered.” Ok, i understand that you are still angry and you do not want to talk to him now”. “It was you and him that had a fight and not me and him”, “So me too i should stop talking to him”. “Babe, i do not think that it is right”. My hubby sat up, “Are we going through this again”? “So he can be your friend and be my enemy”? He asked mockingly. “Babe, we are not fighting na”.”Ok, if i stop talking to your friend because both of you are fighting, when both of you eventually make up, what happens to me”? I asked. “Will i not look foolish”? Iyke, he just got up and left me gaping at his back. I tire for the mata o. Abeg what do you think? Make i tap expo as me, i no know how i wan take handle this mata o!!

GUESS IYKE’s COMMENT

Madam, i am so honored. Thank you so much for your mails. As always, i really do not have all the answers. A tricky situation. Many people will argue that it just might depend on what caused the fight. Was your husband the offender or was his friend the offender (You just refused to tell me that part sha – I understand though). It’s easy to take sides when the odds are in our favor but when they are against us, the story changes.

If you fought with your female friend to the extent that both of you “hate each other” and you guys are not on speaking terms, would it be okay with you if your hubby is talking to her? I think your answer lies in this question. Well for argument sake one could say “I can say hi to the person out of courtesy without being friendly”. Well let me paint two scenarios (1) when you are with your hubby you don’t say hi so as to respect/impress your hubby (2) When you are without your hubby you say hi as it seems the right thing to do..Exactly why i said it’s a tricky situation. It is likely that you guys have other mutual friends so try and see how they can intervene and resolve the matter. I also think that you can communicate with this your hubby’s friend and let him understand why you cannot be saying hi to him because hey, you cannot afford to lose your husband.

You said…”Ok, if i stop talking to your friend because both of you are fighting, when both of you eventually make up, what happens to me”? I asked. “Will i not look foolish”?…Well honestly, that is the price you will pay for being married. You guys are no more two but one especially as you will want him to do the same for you if the tables were turned. I hope my answer helped you in some ways.

Thank you for sharing your TRUE STORY with GUESS IYKE. I wish you the best in whatever decision(s) you make plus please look out for comments on this thread. God bless u plenty.

Guess Iyke

Thank you for reading GUESS IYKE’s TRUE STORIES..Beta to follow you

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