Welcome to your talk show Impact Formula
Segment – Analysis of our Society’s Diaries (ASD)-(ANALYST’s OPINION)
Topic – A man who battered his ex wife has just proposed to your sister, what will you advice her?
Key notes: Someone sent me a true story: “His wife divorced him because he physically abused her, now he wants to marry me”. This is pretty straight forward. What will you advice her?
Chamii could not join us today
I think our friend here doesn’t need advice but counsel. This is because it seems straightforward to advise that she shouldn’t marry him. There are underneath issues why she is confused.
Based on the information shared in the story, I deduce that the man has issues with his temper, and his previous wife fled for her life and filed for divorce.
1.Has he met with counselors to resolve his domestic abuse issue? Emotional issues don’t just go away by prayers or by wishes.
2.Why would she say “he wants to marry me”? isn’t it more responsible to say “we decided to get married”? In this present age and time, men should not “marry” women, rather “people” should marry! That speaks of much more responsibility, not for a woman to be secretly irresponsible and fold her hands and say: he wants to marry me.
3.Despite knowing that the man has issues, why exactly does she feel hesitant and asked for advice?
Wells could not join us today
Zee has a “kinki” surprise for us all….look out for details
Thank you Chams, J, Wells and Zee. I will always appreciate you guys…ALWAYS…There will be no ASD without you peeps. Gracias.
A man who battered his ex wife has just proposed to your sister, what will you advice her?
This is a very sensitive issue and i will approach it with wisdom(as much as i can)
In the first instance; How did she find out about the mans’ experience with his ex wife? Is it something the man told her himself or did she find out from someone else. Or is it something he told her out of circumstance? Did she have to prise the information out of the man even after she asked him; or was he remorseful when recounting the experience. Now if the man hid his past experience from her, it could be (1) He is scared that he might lose her if he tells her (2) He’s not proud of what he did and does not like to talk about it.
In the second instance; Before she found out about the mans’ experience with his ex wife, did she perceive any anger issues with him?
My argument is simple: “Some people can bring out the beast in you while others can bring out the best in you”. I can not make excuses for a man who battered his wife because she brought out the beast in him. I CAN NEVER MAKE SUCH EXCUSE FOR THE MAN.
Instead, i am trying to put up a defense for the woman who knew that this man’s ex wife divorced him because he was beating her. So can it now be that if the man finds a proper connection with the right woman, he will be his best “always”….hmmmm!
In all honesty, yes we can argue that “people change” etc. Yet it is a very hard situation for me because if he ends of beating her up, people will always say…..”So you knew that his wife divorced him because he was beating her, yet you went ahead to marry him”? You get my meaning? It could just be the case of “a time bomb waiting to go off”!!
I can go on and on and on but ….A man who battered his ex wife has just proposed to your sister, what will you advice her?
I will lay all the cards faced up for her and allow her make her decisions.
We really are all learners and i appreciate YOU my ANALYST’s for sharing your opinion. I look forward to more topics and your contributions. Thank you so much as we continue the conversation on this thread. Thank you for viewing Guess Iyke’s (ASD). You can join also our team of ANALYST’s.